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The Tension Is Killing You

Things are so awkward between you, you can cut the tension with a knife. She is being distant. Her responses cold or non-existent. How did she get this way? You rack your brain to try to figure out what you could’ve done to make her act this way?

You wonder what you’re supposed to do when you see her next. The impending doom of that meeting consumes your mind.

What do you do? What do you say? How are you supposed to act?

The 2 Most Important Things That Will Make Or Break Your Next Meeting

There’s probably some part of you that thinks that if you weren’t so nervous you would know exactly what to say. That part of you is speaking some truth here.

The first important thing to be aware of when you see her next is your own “energy”. What I mean by this is that if you are a nervous wreck when you see her next she will feel your “nervous energy” and it will in turn make her nervous around you.

In order to shift this you have to “manage your energy”. Remind yourself that she is just a person… she is! Remember that she’s not perfect, either. She had her own issues in your relationship. If you can bring her down to size with your thoughts, it will be much easier to relate to her on even playing ground.

If you know that your meeting will NOT be random, then you can manage your energy before you see her. Go for a workout prior to meeting her, or talk to another female on the phone before your meeting. The workout will help get you in a positive state. The phone call will get you focused on another person so that you’re not second guessing your conversation with her.

What To Say Depends On The Terms

If the two of you left it on friendly terms then allow the conversation to be playful and lighthearted. Remind her of a funny story you shared, or talk about something awesome or funny that happened to you. Keep the conversation out of any serious topics that reference your old relationship.

If the two of you left it on a bad note and she’s noticeably avoiding you, then give her the space she’s asking for. If she has a knee jerk reaction to you, she needs to let go of that reaction herself. She has to be the one that comes to you. Don’t try to force any interaction with her. If you’re constantly running into her and feel like she is constantly avoiding you, you can send her this text:

Text Message Example:

“Now that we’ve had some time apart, I think it’s a good idea. If I see you out and about I’ll give it some space. Maybe in the future we can be friends.”

Then, do as the text message commits to doing. Give it space. Let the relationship breathe.

Remember to check into your specific situation to know which technique is more appropriate for you.

If you want more tested text messages for when you see her next, check out this video from my friend Dan.